When I woke up this morning, I hadn't graduated from seminary. When I go to bed, I will be a graduate of San Francisco Theological Seminary. Weird, huh?
It hasn't exactly sunk in that I'm done. It is a strange feeling of accomplishment that I have. Strange, because I worked so much harder the first few years than I did this past year. In some ways, I feel like I have been done academically for awhile.
The seminary presdiednt makes a comment about conferring upon us the rights and privileges that come with a Masters of Divinity. I've been wondering what those rights and privileges are. Low wages? Session meetings? The frustrations of matching your "call" and your gifts? Or is it the privileges of getting to be with people in their lowest moments. The privilege of baptizing an infant. The privilege of baptizing an adult. The privilege of presiding over a funeral.
Well, the fact of the matter is it is about both the good and the bad. I feel like I'm stepping into a really big world today. Our baccalaureate speaker talked about us being threads in a tapestry. I feel that right now. A lot of people have accomplished what I have. I feel like I joined a fraternity this morning, and I don't mean that in a perjorative sense. People have asked me if I feel any different. I typically respond with a joke about having mastered divinity. The truth of the matter is that I do feel different. I have been changed. I'm coming out of the furnace. I'm sure I'll have a similar feeling after being ordained.
I never really took the time to think about what this day might mean to me. For many, it brings anxiety. Leaving the relative safety of seminary for who knows what. I have the fortune of knowing where I'm going (I'll save that for another post). Finishing seminary feels like taking the scenic route home. Maybe finishing at THIS seminary feels like taking the scenic route home. I don't know.
This is rambly. I'm pretty tired and really emotional. More of both than I expected. My life is different and I wanted to write about it. I didn't really know what was going to come out, I just knew I wanted to write about it. I am a seminary graduate.
I have mastered divinty!